A Beautiful and Appreciated Woman

Are you a woman? Do you feel like a torn and tattered dish rag or a beautiful fluffy wash cloth?

A long, very long time ago I personally used to feel like a dish rag, but I became a soft fluffy monogrammed wash cloth. How? One day I decided to dedicate a day each week to simply taking care of myself, putting my self first. After a good 4 months of my weekly self first ritual, I started to assess my love relationship to see if it was supportive of dish rag territory or fluffy wash cloth land. It was the rag world, my relationship was not supporting my inner beauty, it was not supporting or appreciating my outer beauty. I concluded that it needed to either change, or go. But he was such a good man, a quality man, top quality. How could I ever send away such a good man?


Love, romantic love, any love really, it needs to support us, our essence, our beauty. Romantic love certainly has this task as one of its primary duties, no?


I am a woman, and I need a man who loves and encourages my woman-ness. Sad as the reality was, my relationship, it had to end so that I might thrive inside, as a woman. As I said, he was a good man, a top quality man, and I love him to this day. But my essence was systematically battered and diminished waiting to be appreciated, waiting to be really wanted, I suppose in that little tiny nuanced way that he simply did not have in him.

I am not at all a needy woman, quite independent indeed, but there is a baseline that can only come from our deep connection to our romantic mate. The universe provides us with our mate precisely so that we can reach that higher plane that we'd not reach alone. When romantic love cannot be shifted, improved to make this level a possibility, then eventually romantic love needs to go in exchange for our essence.

Once I was alone and past the pain of the loss, I bloomed, I stood up straighter, I breathed deeper, I started to care more for myself, appreciate myself, take care of my physical, emotional, spiritual needs. I will never again be with a mate that, despite his kind and gentle nature, and through no fault of his own, leaves me neglected and feeling like a dish rag instead of a soft fluffy monogrammed wash cloth.

Today I am with a mate that appreciates me as a baseline. It is very low maintenance love affair, but that depth of appreciation is understood and felt by my essence, by my cells. Today I thrive as the soft and fluffy wash cloth that I am meant to be, and love being.

This is frugality and best use of my spirit, emotions, energy, and my sense of wellbeing.